And why sit-down meals matter

by DON GENOVA

The kitchen table of my youth was Formica-topped, decorated with intricate swirls of colour typical of the early 1960s. Nestled into the corner of our kitchen, a heavy metal pedestal kept it upright, and an L-shaped, faux-leather upholstered bench surrounded it.
Every evening at five we gathered there for dinner. My dad would be anchored firmly in one corner, with my brother on his left, me on his right, my sister beside me, and my mother in the lone wooden chair, so she could access the stove.
At night, after the dishes had been washed and dried, the table was where I did my homework. In the summer it became the base of operations for my mother’s canning and preserving. In the winter it was where the Christmas baking cooled. My father always sat at that table to write out the cheques to pay our bills.
In a way, the kitchen table was the heart of our family, where we compared days at work and school, made plans, and of course had the occasional argument. Unfortunately, the kitchen table is a much less important component of many homes these days. Now we have elaborate islands, glamorous dining rooms, or breakfast nooks. In place of the good old kitchen table, designers now flaunt tiny kitchen “office” areas, complete with internet connection, bookshelves, and corkboards. (The corkboards are a place to leave notes for each other, since today’s families may cross paths only a few times during the day.)
The sit-down family dinner just may be a thing of the past. Entrepreneur.com recently reported a couple of sad statistics on its “Trends” page:
Roughly 25 per cent of all meals eaten at night in America are eaten in a restaurant.
–“What, When and Where Americans Eat,” January 2006
The number of meals purchased in a restaurant and eaten in a car is 32 per person per year, up from 19 in 1985.
–NPD Group, November 2005
Although these are American studies, there’s no reason to believe it’s any different here in Canada, judging by the number of fast-food restaurants—many with drive-throughs—that populate our towns and cities.
The downside of eating out, eating in our cars, and not gathering around that kitchen table is the effect on our families. Less family time around the table can have harmful consequences for kids. A 2004 University of Minnesota study found that the more frequently children ate with their parents, the less likely they were to smoke, drink, use marijuana, or show signs of depression. Girls were also less likely to do badly in school—or to think about, or try, committing suicide.
Ironically, a recent study shows rising fuel prices may contribute to the family’s return to the kitchen table. A 2007 report by the NPD Group found that “Coinciding with the rise in gas prices, there has been a slowdown in per capita visits to restaurants. Consumers report going out to eat less, especially at casual dining and family-style restaurants. Instead, they say they are opting to eat at home more, citing ‘cheaper prices’ as the primary factor.” 
Too bad it’s not because they want to spend more time together eating as a family!
But some people are doing it right. My neighbours across the street don’t have a table in the kitchen, but they use the large table in the dining room for all meals, homework, crafts, and other family projects.
As for me, this summer I’m having a wall knocked out of our kitchen to connect it to the rest of the living and dining space in that part of the house. There won’t be a table in the kitchen, but I’m hoping
the island I’m having constructed will function in much the same way as did the kitchen table of old. There’ll be lots of room for people to eat and work at it, and stools so they can sit together and chat as I’m chopping and cooking.
Still, I wish I knew where that Formica table was now. It wouldn’t fit in with my new decor, but I’d pull it out for big gatherings, and will the spirit of all those dinners (and homework assignments, and bill-paying sessions) over all those years to flow over my family and friends.
Don Genova is renovating his kitchen this summer. His wife has graciously agreed to let him make most of the decisions, which should make both of them very happy. Watch their progress at blog.dongenova.com/kitchen_and_bath_renovations/.

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