Will You Marry Me?

Romi Chandra, community developer with the Self-Help Resource Association (left) and Spencer Herbert, City of Vancouver Parks Board Commissioner and keen environmentalist

selfhelpresource.bc.ca, vancouver.ca/parks/board/commissioners.htm

photo by Jaime Kowal

How they met: It was love at first sight seven and a half years ago at Wreck Beach, says Spencer. (Both were fully clothed.)

Spencer on Romi: “He faced adversity growing up. As an immigrant, English wasn’t his first language. He then found he was facing homophobia, so he was an outsider on a couple of fronts. He met allies who worked with him, and he saw what a difference they could make.”

Bragging rights: “We fit together very well. He’s got awareness about things that I don’t. He’s a social organizer and a party planner and somebody that makes people feel good about themselves. And he’ll call me on my crap!”

If I could change one thing about Romi, it would be... “I’d give him more confidence—confidence that his voice is always worth hearing. But I don’t really want to change anything about him.”

Romi on Spencer: “[Spencer got where he is] by pushing people’s buttons and challenging people in power. One of the TransLink board members actually threw horse poo at him from a wheelbarrow during the Pride Parade. So the next year he made his own parade entry and carried a wheelbarrow with flowers in it as a response. That shows what kind of person he is.”

Bragging rights: “A solid understanding that no matter what happens, the problem will be worked through, and we don’t lose our relationship as a threat.”

And one more thing: “We’ve been talking about marriage for years. I love Spence, and the challenges presented in our lives only strengthen us. This is crazy and nerve-wracking, but… I’d like to take this opportunity to finally propose. Spencer, will you marry me?”

—Kathy Sinclair

UPDATE: He Said YES! Look for more in March's issue.